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i dont like to lick my friends balls, unless there chocolate balls, like malteasers or m&ms, revlles too

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Ahh terribble night, i lost part of my left hand, 3 fingers to be precise! I now hate dogs

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York bound in 6 hours time. ETA: 1233 - meet me at the station if you want. I have a big suitcase.

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Its not a good sign when the lights in the library go out - maybe I have been here too long..... plus I have really bad toothache :(

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What's that coming over the hill, is it a monster, is it a monster?

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Stornoway, Derwent Bar, Tomorrow 7.30pm, Only 49 tickets left online - yusu.org/shop

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looking forward to epic journey to Bangor for Radio 1's Big Weekend

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Missed my booked train but have found myself on the friendlyest one ever - a lady has just given me half of her BLT sandwich - my favourite : )

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Ridgebourne Pub Quiz Winners - first time ever in five years. This is the greatest day of my life.